Learning with 2 kids and a mommy

Cultivating siblings love

Cultivating siblings love

Parents with more than 1 child in the family, bet you know how challenging it is to raise them. Why? Because they always FIGHT!

Yes and I really mean FIGHT! They fight for
– food
– seats
– attention
– who goes first
– who goes last
– who drinks more or less
Basically, they fight for anything and everything and things you can’t even imagine can fight for.

Why do they fight? Because
– they love it
– they find it fun
– they have nothing better to do
– they are SIBLINGS!

It’s tough and the house will becomes a war zone whenever they fight. My house is always a war zone, by the way. No matter how hard they fight, how often they fight, it will always creates an opportunity for them to love each other as well.

Do you know that fighting creates an opportunity for them to find ways to solve a problem, in other words, finding solution to their problem? They may have conflict in one way or the other and they have to learn to resolve this conflict among themselves. We, as parents, do not need to be always there to help them, however in some situations we may need to step in to guide them on how to solve it. We will need to be their referee and that’s when we teach them about siblings love as well.

Cultivating siblings love can be as easy as 123 or/and as difficult as nailing jelly to a tree. There are 3 most basic skills I want them to learn about and cultivate siblings love.

1. Respect
No matter how much you hate each other during the fight. They are expected to respect each other’s feelings and bodies. No physical actions, no vulgarities, no forcing, no calling of names.
sibling1-1

2. Help each other as much as they can
Whenever opportunities arise for them to help each other, I will definitely encourage them to do so. If one needs help, the other should try to help as much as he/she can. No comparing of who help more. This action will encourage them to take care of each other and be considerate to each other.
sibling3-1

3. Creating positive family environment
As a parent, always show fairness. No preferences among the siblings. All are your children, shouldn’t you love them all the same? Praise them when they are nice to each other. Positive feelings make them feel good. Of course, not over doing it. We have to be sensitive to the children’s feelings as well.
sibling3

Parenting is never easy. No one said it is easy anyway. We grow together with our children and we learn about each other everyday. If there are days where you find it too tough to handle, just take a breather. Stay calm, be positive and be patience because they learn from us too.

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